Dear Cole Haan, Here’s my subway story… On my way to work today, I switched cars cause the train smelled like a urine filled skunk pouch. After switching, the train stopped for 28min due to an earlier incident. When the car finally moved, a nice looking man dressed in a three-piece suit yelled at the passengers saying he was Satan’s spawn and that he’d be killing all of our first borns. Also: I was puked on, cursed at, sold 2 candy bars (delicious!), handed a Jesus pamphlet and inappropriately fondled. BUT I was able to finish Hunger Games! All-in-all it was just another boring ride. - NYC Subway Rider
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Dear Cole Haan,

Here’s my subway story…

On my way to work today, I switched cars cause the train smelled like a urine filled skunk pouch. After switching, the train stopped for 28min due to an earlier incident. When the car finally moved, a nice looking man dressed in a three-piece suit yelled at the passengers saying he was Satan’s spawn and that he’d be killing all of our first borns. Also: I was puked on, cursed at, sold 2 candy bars (delicious!), handed a Jesus pamphlet and inappropriately fondled. BUT I was able to finish Hunger Games! All-in-all it was just another boring ride. - NYC Subway Rider

Six years ago, I pledged my loyalty to you, New York, as your urban dweller, to live together, in the holy state of smallapartmentrimony. I promised to love you, see shows with you, visit museums with you, drink and eat with you, in fuck-ass-cold winter and in fuck-as-hot summer. I further promised that, forsaking all others, I would live only with you - unless work in LA calls - as long as we both shall live. During these six years, I have been faithful to that pledge. And near the beginning of our sixth year together you have done the same, by providing me with precious moments like the attached video. In the presence of my two (1 being my mom) Tumblr followers, I’d like to say thank you for all your craziness - that man yelling at a poll yesterday was sweet. I look forward to many more exciting memories. I love you and always will.

Kevin